06.04.26 How's this for a "Man-Cave" plan...

     "Ya'll gonna make me lose my mind, up (in) here and down there"..... That's of course an edited line from the 1999 song from DMX titled, Party Up. Funny, I've had a lot of musical referrals lately, don't know what that's about. Anyway in today's  “I'm losing my mind post” here's one that most guys, sorry girls, might agree with me on. 

     So imagine this. A middle-aged man at 58, middle-aged runs from 40-65, is in the midst of blowing up his life, for the better, and has, or is about to, "lose" everything he had and knew about himself. Now, truth be told, losing most of what I had or have is a good and healthy thing. People ask, "Don't you feel better?", and yes I do. The weighted-blanket of all the shit I have lugged around for years, most of it used, damaged, or even unused, could be criteria for some mental health disorder. I liken our "stuff" to having a towel wrapped around you when you get out of the shower with people in the bathroom. 

     Heading down to a 55 and over sounds like a dream, and it is, but it's scary as hell as well. My parents just did this at 78 and it was a HUGE adjustment for them. Going from the big house down to a more respectable house in a 55 and over. Now 78 and 58 is different, 78 is a senior citizen. At that age you're lucky to be rolling into a 55 and over and not an assisted living facility. But the point is they had to downsize in a big way, although they still have three storage units filled with things they need to edit through. I can say it's hard to "get rid of it all", but we have done a yeoman's job in doing that, but there's still just stuff. 

     Sun City Hilton Head is a huge complex. It covers 5,800 acres, has about 20,000 residents living in 10,000 homes. It's really a small town that is split by Beaufort and Jasper Counties. It started in 1996 and has grown exponentially in the last eight years as the flight of New Yorkers, Jerseyan's, and Pennslytuckians, flee the northeast. As we've looked for a home down there we have become half-ass experts, or at least more in the know. There's four sections, and each has its goods and bads. Older you get stucco and pop-corn ceilings but beautiful mature landscaping and newer you get new with none of the old stuff but they sit on clear cut lands and are stuffed in like sardines. 

     The only way I can describe new or newer construction is to refer you back to the final scene in "Goodfellas". It's there that Henry Hill, played by Ray Liotta, is shown adjusting to his new life in the witness-protection program. 

     And that's the part that's scary to me. Now the Tobacco Road yard that I've kept, which reminds me Sanford & Son, isn't mentally normal, but it is still a part of me and I don't know how I can let that go. So basically it comes down to a white-trash guy trying to fit into a non white-trash way of living. 

    In our search we've went from small, to medium, to bigger, and now back down to small. Basically everything in a 55 and over is two bedrooms and two bathrooms. If you need or got it like that more money gets you an office, a Carolina room, and a lanai. Of course upgrades drive up the price. One of those upgrades is an "extended garage", which is a whopping four more feet. But hey, they say size doesn't matter, but every inch counts, especially when you're downsizing.  

     And what I have seen is people who have made the jump design, stack, and cram, everything they couldn't get rid or, or need, into these cookie-cutter homes. Sometimes it's in the closets, in the pull-down access attics, or some wildly designed garages with things that slide, stack, and even hang off the ceiling. And in those garages are a slice of a guys past. A small toolbox, a table for tinkering, maybe even an electric lawnmower or edge trimmer, if landscaping in that part of the complex isn't covered by the HOA fees, and of course golf clubs or a fishing pole. There's nothing on the outside of the homes, no tools, no kayaks, no broken rotor-tillers, no garbage cans, nothing. It's sterile. It's tight. And it is questionable for privacy. And then there's the booming business of storage units. I don't want one, and don't want to pay monthly for one. 

     And what about privacy out here in Titusville. Honestly, these days, I piss outside more then I do inside. It's my way from anything from happening in the house, a house we don't even feel like is our's anymore. Needless to say I'm not stepping out of my 55-and over home and releaving myself in the bushes without someone seeing me. But maybe that does happen more often than not down there as dementia sets in, but not from a 58 year-old. 

     And what will I do with the boat? And all my fly tying and fishing stuff? The garage is supposed to be a place to park the golf cart and maybe a beach umbrella and some chairs. Tools- I don't want to see them anymore. So I, well we, came up with a solution. Buy a smaller place that really lives like a vacation home. Minimal stuff with all of the space livable. Buying small would mean less expensive, and that could leave some money to buy a place outside of the the bubble that is Sun City.

     I found the above absolute perfect solution to my problem. A place to store the boat, all of my shit, a place to go and tinker and escape the sterility that is a 55 and over community. Luke can run the fenced in yard while I sit and feel like a man again. 

     Can you imagine the Jones parked under there? And the building could be just a great hang. I'll even bring my new buds up there when they need to escape for a bit. It seems like it's perfect. And the beauty is it's 20 minutes from two boat launches into the Broad River. Need I say more?

     And on top of everything else it could be a good investment. While it's in a mixed use occupancy neighborhood now, that hood is changing. Just look at what's literally across the street now.

     And when I look at Google Earth there are several foundations laid for similar type houses going up all along that street. I say go all in. Use it for a few years. Get my Tobacco Roadness out of my system before actually settling into true 55 and over living and then sell it to the developers, hopefully for a profit. But the truth is may be under contract or sold already, but it seems like it's a real solid plan that checks off a lot of boxes. 

    There's so many moving parts with this move, and for that to all work out. Unfortunately we have to wait for the closing here before we can make some of these moves.  I've made a ton of dumb decisions in my life and this could be another, or actually one that makes sense all the way around. Stay tuned and follow the bouncing ball. But if you come and visit, we'll sight for reds and then head back to "Archer's Corner" to wash the boat, have a beer, and sit inside the air conditioned sugar shack. With electric, city water and sewer, already on the property we can go to the bathroom inside, like normal people.